heystasa: (Helga)
[personal profile] heystasa

It is 10:50 on a Friday night. I am sitting happily on my couch, DVD on in the background, laptop on my lap, pizza in my belly. It's nice. Relaxing. I haven't a care in the world.

Kylee and Amy, however, are sitting on the dining room floor, surrounded in tools, rubbish, and bits and pieces of the filing cabinet they've been building for the last three hours.

(For those who haven't met them, I should say, they are both totally brilliant, but K and Amy are not the sort of people who, at a glance, make you think SCREWDRIVERS AND HEAVY LIFTING AND TECHINCAL EPTITUDE OMG.)

The fact that they keep descending into hysterics due to, for example, having no idea what they're doing, or, say, suddenly realising they've spent their entire evening assembling a (very small and unassuming) piece of bright red office furniture and they still don't have the drawers done and are slowly losing their will to live is not helping things go faster.

I could offer to help, but that would be no fun.

Some highlights:

STELLA: How long have you been working on it now? Two hours?
AMY: *laughing* Yes.
KYLEE: I feel like I've been doing this my entire life.

KYLEE: AM I MEANT TO PUT TWO HOLES IN THIS?!

AMY: WHERE THE FUCK IS SCREW 6?!

KYLEE: I hate people! I hate people and things and stuff.
AMY: *laughing* I hate eeeverything.
KYLEE: And I hate you!

KYLEE: This was all my fault; I said it was a nice one. It looked nice in the sho-op!

KYLEE: Aha! This goes here!
AMY: Yes, but that still doesn't answer the question of what the fuck are these things and what the fuck are we supposed to do with them.

STELLA: How do you spell "filing"?
AMY: F-I-L-I-N-G.
KYLEE: F-U-C-K-O-F-F.

AMY: *looks at the bit they've done*
FILING CABINET: *CRASH*


Oh, oh, they're putting one of the drawers in! Last time they tried that the front fell off!

Eeeasy, eeeasy... OH MY GOD THEY'VE ACTUALLY DONE IT! They've successfully built a drawer! Only two more to go.

Oh, I am having such a lovely evening.


Date: 2010-03-12 12:41 pm (UTC)
ext_3638: I'm in ur history, emphasising ur wimminz (go ahead and panic)
From: [identity profile] kayloulee.livejournal.com
*weeps*

And it's all true, too. Not only that but we have to do the second bookcase tomorrow and my desk and chair on Monday because Officeworks fucked up and didn't send them today.

*weeps some more*

Date: 2010-03-12 12:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] highlyeccentric.livejournal.com
I hate EVERYTHING.

ALL OF IT.

Except the wastepaper basket. It is, as Sjazz puts it, "something that you bought today that isn't from Satan".

Date: 2010-03-12 12:51 pm (UTC)
ext_3638: I'm in ur history, emphasising ur wimminz (Default)
From: [identity profile] kayloulee.livejournal.com
The wastepaper basket is love. It is also a hat!

Date: 2010-03-12 12:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sjazzmreow.livejournal.com
I'm sorry. I really am so, so sorry. But saying that only makes me laugh harder.

Tell me the desk has drawers too. You do so well with drawers.

Would you like me to bring in some more chocolate?

Date: 2010-03-12 12:59 pm (UTC)
ext_3638: I'm in ur history, emphasising ur wimminz (Default)
From: [identity profile] kayloulee.livejournal.com
Oh FUCK. It does. *headDESK*

No, I don't need more chocolate, I don't want to be on a sugar high until 1am.

Date: 2010-03-12 11:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lucymonster.livejournal.com
They're not handicapped - they're handicapable!

Date: 2010-03-13 01:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 3771.livejournal.com
*snickersnicker*

Date: 2012-01-15 01:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] highlyeccentric.livejournal.com
Stella, you need to know that every so often, when I need cheering up, I re-read this post...

Date: 2012-01-18 11:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sjazzmreow.livejournal.com
Aww, happy to help, bb. *hugs*

I just laughed so hard reading through it all again, thank you so much for reminding me of it. That was such a great night (well, for me at least).

Also, I MISS YOU GUYS. :(

Date: 2012-01-18 11:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] highlyeccentric.livejournal.com
You should come play with us one weekend!

August 2012

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