And this is my sister not being helpful

I'm out the back patting our old dog, Jack, who is notorious for licking people. Mum calls him "the fastest tongue in the west", and any time spent with him involves avoiding his constantly moving tongue. He finally gets me, so I go inside to wash my hands and lips.

Stella (laughing): Lucy, he got me on the mouth!

Lucy (cracking up, suddenly has an evil thought): Aww! He licks his balls with that tongue!

Stella: *SHRIEEEEKS & flails* OH MY GOD shut up!!!

Lucy (gleefully): And his bumhole!

Stella: EW EW EW I HAVE TO DISINFECT MY MOUTH!!!